Misery Loves Misery

22 Jun

I haven’t posted in a second and that’s because I’ve been marinating on something that I really don’t want to share or give too much energy to but it’s kind of bothering me.  This is supposed to be my free space but you never know who’s reading and how the written word will be interpreted.  But whatever, these are my thoughts and this is my blog and I’m grown. 

Where I’m going with this is that I am very much shocked at some of the reactions that I’m getting from people who I expected the exact opposite reaction.  It’s amazing, really.  There are people who I totally did not expect to be happy for me who are like…really happy for me and really invovled and invested in sharing all of this joy.  Then…there are people who I really thought would be amped who are very…very…not and unfortunately at every opportunity very vocal about it. 

It’s just really blowing me.  I don’t want to give alot of details and I hate even writing this post but I had to get this out.  This is a very delicate situation…hell, I might even have to make this post private.  I  just want us all to be happy.  Ugh. 

On a more positive note, the love that I have been receiving from nearly everyone else has been a true blessing, very pure, and I’m holding it all close to my heart.  I’m just a big ball of thankfulness, love, and appreciation.  I extend this to all of you who read here as well, seriously.  This is beautiful and I thank you for sharing in this journey with me.

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5 Responses to “Misery Loves Misery”

  1. PorterGirl June 23, 2010 at 2:01 am #

    Sadly I understand your situation. Since I have been engaged I’ve learned so much about women and how we really don’t know how to celebrate one another. I have always been the friend that cheered everyone on or had that encouraging word. I never really looked to my friends for a lot of things, emotional things especially. I have lost a lot of women in my family and now that this milestone in my life is approaching I found myself looking for my friends to support me..NOT.
    Just as you have found, misery loves company. If your relationship is WORKING and theirs is not…who wants to hear about it. lol. Thank you for this post, I got to vent a little.

  2. Maggie June 23, 2010 at 2:04 pm #

    Just a lurker stopping by…Not engaged nor have I been married, but I have a friend going through this right now. Except her volatile person is a close family member who let Mr. Right get away. Now that he has found a new love and she has not she seems to try to rain on everybody’s parade whether dating, engaged or married.

    I hate that you have to deal with this, but remember this is about you and the mr.

  3. Tiffany In Houston July 8, 2010 at 4:00 am #

    I am sorry this is happening to you and it is to be expected. There are people I have barely known 6 months who are ESTATIC for me and sorors that I have known 10 years who are barely lukewarm. I have one friend in particular who lectured me 3 days after my engagement about how hurt she was that she was not included at my engagement party. Little did she know, I had NO idea that I was getting engaged that night. I thought it was simply a get together. About 30 minutes into the conversation, did I even get a congrats.

    DO NOT, I repeat, DO NOT let that person’s negativity get into your space. I hate to say this but you may need to re-think them being in your wedding and you may need to limit your contact and conversations with this person.

    Blame it on busyness, school, work, whatever..but do what you need to do to protect your headspace and your relationship with your future husband. I had people tell me that this type of situation was bound to happen and I didn’t believe them, but it did. Some folks are going to fade to black, and unfortunately that’s just the circle of life.

    It’s our obligation to try to be as gracious as possible with our friends who may be wrestling with their own issues. It is not our obligation to be anyone’s dumping ground.

    My email addy is on my blog. Holla if you need me.

    Sorry for blogging in your comments. 🙂

  4. Aisha July 8, 2010 at 9:15 pm #

    It’s funny how at the most important milestones in our lives birth, marriage and death can bring out so much negativity.

    My sister got married to the worse bum ever. So I know what it’s like to try and warn people about marriage. We had concrete evidence of his infidelity and his criminal ways. That’s totally different than poo pooing on the instiutution. So unless Tresvant is robbing banks she needs to release those emotions else where.

  5. aroundthewaygirl August 11, 2010 at 1:41 pm #

    I’ve been looking at this post alot lately. Thank you ladies for these words because I’ve been feeling like no one understands. Because of your replies it is a bit easier to not take things so personally. I really have to thank you all!

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